Wednesday, November 24, 2010

The Arrangement

My son has a sweet admiration for the loveliest little girl... and always has. He just really adores her. He would follow her straight into an active volcano infested with bad guys and pumpkin slime. And she tolerates him so well!

I wouldn't normally encourage or nurture any such spark at the tender age of six... except that I completely understand how he feels because his mother happens to be one of my most favorite people that I would run thru a desert and leap over cars with fire coming out of them for. HA!

Kailee is just a sweetheart. She is patient, kind, nurturing... and bossy in every best intention! I'm just sure it reminds him of his mommy, and that has to be why she is his (third) favorite girl to be around (I am his first, naturally and I will give his sister the silver medal... or she might make me sorry...). :)

Dawson started going to Good News Club that a local church sponsors after school one day a week. Kailee brought him the first day, so they gave her an In-N-Out gift card! Being the sweet soul that she is, she immediately offered it to Dawson (see why I like my kid to hang out with her?! She's teaching him to give! Priceless!!).

Dawson in turn didn't think it was fair that she give up free In-N-Out since clearly she had earned the burger. So he told her they should go together and share it.

She agreed!

Then, he suggested they go for frozen yogurt afterward using the gift card the Hunters gave him for his birthday.

She agreed!

The kids both came home and explained the plan to their over protective mothers who would normally never condone such an arrangement... but when we realized it would mean we get to hang out together and spy on our kids enjoying their childhood... and then have a blackmail story to taunt them with when they are teenagers and that is, like, SUCH an embarrassing story... we were as good as there.

Plus... we had it chaperoned by the best bouncer around (Kailee's little sister and Anabelle's BFF!):

And of course her trusty yet fearsome sidekick (little bro), Joshua-bear!, who's only known weakness is the sweet distraction of his first taste of frozen yogurt heaven.

Who could blame him?

These kids kill me with their cuteness.

...So Im hoping I'll be invited on all his dates yet to come since I set such a careful standard this time around. And hopefully it doesn't happen again for at least another decade (and a half).


Saturday, November 20, 2010

Passive Aggressive Much?

"MOOOOOM! (tears)... Minerva just BIT me and SCRACHED me, and ALL I WAS DOING WAS LOVING HERRRRR!

(sniff) ........... "maybe if I draw her a picture she will want to be friends with me...?"

~A few moments of silence followed by pitter patter down hall, SLAM of front door...

"Well. The picture idea didnt work out so... I just went ahead and threw her out in the rain."

Oh, Anabelle Lee.

I love you.

Monday, November 15, 2010

A Glimpse Into the Heart of Six

I'm going to try really hard to start doing this at every birthday, and I'm sad I didn't start doing it earlier. Here is my son's first exclusive interview as a six year old... you should consider bookmarking it. It may be worth money some day when he publishes his first medical journal. ;)

What is something your Mom always says to you?

I love you. And don't turn 6.

What makes your Dad happy?

He's proud of my homework at school.

How does your Mom make you laugh?

She tickles me. A lot.

What do you think your Mommy was like as a little girl?

You liked Daddy.

How old is Mom?

22. ( Daws: But how old are you really? Me:...27. Daws: "Oh. can you write that instead?") ~ Ha.

How tall is Mommy?

28 inches.

Whats Mom's favorite thing to do?

Tease Dad and snuggle and watch movies

If our family became famous, what would it be for?

You and Dad would be movie stars.

What is something Dad is really good at?

Playing Nerf guns with me.

What is something Mom is NOT very good at?

Shooting guns. Because you're scared of them.

What is your favorite thing to eat?


What are you the best at doing of anyone you know?

I spying with my little eyes.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

A police officer.

Who is your favorite person to hang out with?

Kaeden (across the street).

If you could go anywhere in the world right now where would you want to be?

Somewhere beachy... Hawaii maybe? Or else Washington state.

Whats your favorite animal?

Snakes and spiders. Because they're insects.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Six Six Six

I've had a day.

Its been the best sort of mom insanity I could have ever hoped and dreamed for, and its every bit as fun as I imagined it to be...

But I am overjoyed, none the less, that it is now the end of the day... and its just me and my iced cold beer sitting mindlessly at the computer amongst the smoldering ruins of streamers and jelly beans gone astray from perpetual party weekend.

My son is 6.

He had his first sleepover. There was just one other boy that spent the night.

It was quite a hit.

And THEN...

We took 5 kids to Chuck E. Cheese.

They all had a blast.

We managed to have a good time too... thanks to BOTH SETS of grandparents that made the 45 minute trek to lend their eyes, ears, and helping hands (BLESS THEM).

I can guarantee you that it was hundreds of times more pleasant than a good majority of the day I was having 6 years ago to the day. Yet there is still something distantly painful about these little anniversaries of the first time I became a mom. It just goes by faster and faster every moment, and it doesn't seem to be slowing down at all...

I just recently found the opportunity to playfully beg Dawson not to turn 6.

He shot right back "Oh, so would you rather I get sick... and die?"

Thats right, folks. My kid is old enough to be witty. My reputation for being the class clown is feeling a little threatened...

I couldnt be more proud of my little legacy in the six years I've had the pleasure of knowing his beautiful face.


Tuesday, November 9, 2010


I know, Halloween is, like, SOOOOO last month.

I'm behind.


I'm more than a little embarrassed to say... with my darling children gaining independence, they are exercising some interesting liberties.

I am a firm believer in choosing battles. Bedtime? Non negotiable. Homework? Non negotiable. Halloween costumes? Alright fine. Be whatever you want...

Dawson wanted to be a skeleton, of course, because I think they're icky and scary. Anabelle? Well. She's got one foot in the powder room... and one foot in the grave apparently. What do you get when you mix the most feminine Disney princess wannabe alive with a burning passion to "one-up" the awesome big brother?...

Why, that would be a skeleton MERMAID, of COURSE!!!

(AKA: Mom's worst nightmare).
Her second choice was Lady Gaga. In the meat dress. I think Skeleton mermaid was actually the less morbid option! ...and... the attire does kind of have Lady Gaga award show written on it. So maybe she got to have her meat suit and eat it too... either way... I'm pretty sure I lost. But whatever. Kind of funny? Later maybe?...after the condescending and judgemental glares of the neighborhood as she parades around proud as a peacock are faded from my short term memory...?

These are some of the sweetest girls we go to church with. HOW EXCITING! We all have matching costumes!... er. Kind of. Look at the expression on poor Eva's face. Oh, my my my.
Anyways. My parents kindly were the candy dispensers once again this year. They're quick studies... no use closing the door and gettin cozy between the greedy little goblins that troll this here neighborhood. They pitched their camp on the front porch and even managed to smile the whole time. Thanks, guys! :)

Ty had to work (bummed.), so we didn't make any huge plans. We didn't have to tho... our neighborhood is kind of insane on Halloween. Some neighbors reported going thru 20lbs of candy. WILD.

Anyways. That said... I was sad to be 'alone' with the masses... so my sweeeeeet friend Bethany not only showed up to be my better half for the night... but in costume no less!

I was actually really excited to dress up to take my kids trick or treating, because I scored this great flapper costume at a yard sale a couple months ago... for $2. Including the boa. WEEE!
My kids, of course had NO idea what a flapper was.
I explained it to them, of course, like a good mother ought to...
Anabelle, in turn, innocently made sure to let people know that her mother was dressed as a "flasher."
We were just about finishing the candy loop and thinking about calling it a night. We found our beloved Hammies who were handing out candy and chatted for awhile...
It was getting cold, and since it was a school night we were contemplating a return to the home front instead of attending the free carnival that a local church sponsors right across the street from our development....
And then Bethany's phone rang.
It was her childhood bff, who (small town!) ended up being my neighbor and knew we were together that evening. Bethany hung up and said "YOUR BROTHER IS AT THE CARNIVAL!!!"
And sure enough....

The Grizzly boys in the 3rd platoon were kind enough to oversee the evening, and among them was our beloved Cadet Harkness!!

My parents, of COURSE, immediately left their candy post and headed up the hill for a family reunion~!!! It was a brief visit, but a visit none the less, and how cool is that!?!?! I can't believe we almost skipped it and missed out...what a bummer it would have been to have him so close and not see him... and Im SO THRILLED my neighbor recognized him! He was probably 5 years old at one of my softball games last time she laid eyes on him.
Who say's the Holy Spirit hides on Halloween?
~"Not I," said the Flasher.

Monday, November 8, 2010

The Stores A Bawt Dawson

My son is officially an author.

Yah, that's right.

He wrote a book.

On his own.

Behind my back.



The boy IS related to me after all! He may look, talk, stand, sit, eat, smell, laugh, scratch, burp, and be every other physical likeness of his father... but the boy has blogger blood, I can smell it!

Anyways. The book.

Its a juicy autobiographical TELL ALL about a young boy's most intricate inner workings... and I am absolutely head over heels about it. Add it to your Amazon wish list ASAP. Its sure to be in most high demand once Oprah catches wind of it.

Since he is spelling phonetically, and his spellcheck was clearly not functioning on his MacBook the day of publication... (Yah, Tyson, that's right. I know what a MacBook is.)... you'll have to use your own translating skills. But I bet money he gets his stroke of literary genius across to you juuust fine thankyouverymuch.


The Stores A Bawt Dawson.
By Dawson.
Illastrated by Dawson.

Wuns a pon a thear wus a cid namd Dawson and he liced gowing to the prck.

One day Dawson fowd a black widoo.

The necst day Dawson saw a plan.

One day he saw a costoom and he ask his mom if he culd buy it his mom sed yes!

Were you hanging on every word?
Do you like how the climax was clearly the "black widooo" (a nod to his dear Auntie who is deathly afraid, I am certain!), and were you not completely riveted at the end, when you waited to hear his mom's response to the "costoom" proposal (which technically *didn't actually happen* but clearly it was slightly elaborated for dramatic effect to keep the captive audience guessing)??!?
I dunno. I think Clark Kent may have some competition over at the Daily Planet one of these days in the not-so-distant future.
Move on over, Superman, here comes your kryptonite in the brave human form of Dawson Matthew! You can use one of these empty boxes from his book signings to clear out your desk...
(I just totally had one of those Scrubs moments where I stare past the heap of dishes stacked on the counter in front of me and daydream peacefully about all of that Dailey Planet crap actually happening. What a happy place to stay awhile....)
Ah, reality. Highly over rated.
Speaking of reality...
Here's a sobering thought:
The boy is six years old... in six days.
Six is the devil's number.
He can't really be that old.
...HoLy CoW, I have a six year old, and he writes books. This is heavy. Superman, maybe youre not fired after all... stick around awhile longer...?